Saturday, March 17, 2012

Women: Homemaker or Job/Career?

Throughout time, husband and wife have been a team and have provided together. God said to Adam, "Cursed is the ground for thy sake" (Genesis 3:17Moses 4:23).

The ground was cursed for Adam's sake. Adam now had responsibilities to fulfill and lessons to learn from fulfilling them. In my post "Date: It's Important," I shared what the men's responsibilities are and how dating helps prepare them and perfect them in fulfilling their responsibilities.

Now what are the women supposed to do?

In The Family: A Proclamation to the World it mentions: "Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children."

Does this mean mothers are supposed to be stay-at-home moms or homemakers?


In my class we were discussing this question. The majority of my classmates are female members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints from various backgrounds and experiences attending college classes with some planning on graduate school, just so you have an idea of the possible variety of opinion.

After arguing about the advantages and disadvantages of a mother working and how exactly it can be adjusted, one girl eventually asked for the doctrine. She wanted to know what exactly we are told to do. She just wanted it clearcut, without any more ambiguity.


Our teacher then mentioned President Ezra Taft Benson words. I went and searched for the exact source and quote and found in a February 22, 1987 Fireside for Parents. President Benson said:
"The Lord clearly defined the roles of mothers and fathers in providing for and rearing a righteous posterity. In the beginning, Adam–not Eve–was instructed to earn the bread by the sweat of his brow. Contrary to conventional wisdom, a mother's calling is in the home, not in the market place. 
"Again, in the Doctrine and Covenants, we read: 'Women have claim on their husbands for their maintenance, until their husbands are taken' (D&C 83:2). This is the divine right of a wife and mother. She cares for and nourishes her children at home. Her husband earns the living for the family, which makes this nourishing possible. With that claim on their husbands for their financial support, the counsel of the Church has always been for mothers to spend their full time in the home in rearing and caring for their children. 
"We realize also that some of our choice sisters are widowed and divorced and that others find themselves in unusual circumstances where, out of necessity, they are required to work for a period of time. But these instances are the exception, not the rule. 
"In a home where there is an able-bodied husband, he is expected to be the breadwinner. Sometimes we hear of husbands who, because of economic conditions, have lost their jobs and expect their wives to go out of the home and work even though the husband is still capable of providing for his family. In these cases, we urge the husband to do all in his power to allow his wife to remain in the home caring for the children while he continues to provide for his family the best he can, even though the job be is able secure may not be ideal and family budgeting will have to be tighter" ("To the Mothers in Zion").
Mothers are to stay home. They are to nurture their children. Even if the family isn't earning as much, the mother should stay home. Keep in mind that as we keep the commandments of God we will prosper. That mortality is only a brief span. Families, if they continue to be righteous, will have eternity for growth and opportunity that they may have missed in mortality because of lack of finances. Have faith in God. Trust in Him. Things will turn out just fine if we do the best we can with what we have been given.

Really begin analyzing with this eternal perspective, what is really necessary?

If your family's goal is to be in the highest kingdom within the Celestial Kingdom, what is necessary to get there? As we work hard to achieve this goal, we are blessed. For to achieve this goal we need to do the little things: daily prayer, daily scripture study, keep the commandments, keep the covenants made, etc. As we do those little things, we are blessed. We are blessed as we work hard to do the best we can. As we work hard to live our beliefs. To live as a covenant people. Heavenly Father will bless us in morality with everything we need if we focus on doing everything God has asked us to do.

Have faith in God. Trust in Him. Do the absolute best you can, repenting often. What is really necessary when put into this perspective?

2 comments:

  1. I was there when President Benson said this at BYU. (I believe it was a devotional, but chances are he said it more than once.). I was troubled by his words as I was planning on a career at the time (mostly to prove how smart and capable I was). When I pondered his words, I finally came to the conclusion that for ME, i needed to obey the counsel of the Prophet. In order for me to become more of the person I hoped to become, I NEEDED to be obedient. At the time, marriage seemed to be on the horizon --although I didn't marry that young man, but I decided that I needed to continue my education. I did not know what life would have in store. I did not know if I would marry or be able to have children. And if I did marry, I had no guarantees that my spouse would live to retirement. I needed to be prepared. But I also needed to be prepared to be obedient, to be willing to live on less, and learn to make a house a home.

    Now, you know the rest of the story, I didn't marry until my late twenties, but your father has been blessed with very marketable talents and skills, so there really was no monetary sacrifice on my part -- just ego sacrifice.

    I still remember very clearly the internal dialogue I had as I envisioned my future.

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    1. I didn't know you were there for that! That's awesome. And I can see how much of a struggle it could be. Even though the counsel was given before I was born, I think it is still a struggle for my generation to accept. It's comforting to know that the prophets will never lead us astray and that they are men of God. That when we have faith in that it helps us adjust more easily to their counsel. But Mom? Thanks for being there. Thanks for being such an example to me.

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